Author Topic: ++++ WHATS UP WITH THE UK BOARD ++++ (Read 570797 times)

tommy.irene · « **Reply #1200 on:** December 04, 2009, 07:52:52 PM »

THE NEW PRIEST

Father O'Malley, the new priest is nervous about hearing confessions, so he asks the older priest to sit in on his sessions. The new priest hears a couple of confessions, then the old priest asks him to step out of the confessional for a few suggestions.

The old priest suggests, "Cross you arms over your chest, and rub your chin with one hand." The new priest tries this.

The old priest suggests, "Try saying things like, 'I see, yes, go on, I understand and how did you feel about that?" The new priest says those things.

The old priest says, "Now, don't you think that's a little better than slapping your knee and saying 'No shite! What happened next"

tommy.irene · « **Reply #1201 on:** December 05, 2009, 06:28:14 PM »

1200 Snipe..

*Yibida* · « **Reply #1202 on:** December 05, 2009, 06:29:34 PM »

Your early tommy ?.... how ya going?....

tommy.irene · « **Reply #1203 on:** December 06, 2009, 07:24:51 PM »

Goodmorning everyone

HellWest'nCrooked · « **Reply #1204 on:** December 07, 2009, 06:41:38 AM »

Hello Tommy and Irene

Guess it is raining in mighty Ireland..

Hope you have a wonderful Christmas

Westie

*Yibida* · « **Reply #1205 on:** December 07, 2009, 11:22:46 AM »

A platoon of soldiers was marching north of Fallujah when they came upon an Iraqi terrorist,
badly injured and unconscious.

On the opposite side of the road was an Australian soldier in a similar but less serious state.

The soldier was conscious and alert and as first aid was given to both men, the
Platoon Leader asked the injured Australian what had happened.

The soldier reported, 'I was heavily armed and moving north along the highway here, and
coming south was a heavily armed insurgent.' We saw each other and
both took cover in the ditches along the road. I yelled to him that
Saddam Hussein was a miserable, lowlife scum bag who got what he deserved.

He yelled back that Kevin Rudd is a bureaucratic, Good-for-nothing, left wing labour
Richard Cranium who knows bu***r all about running the country.'

'So I said that Osama Bin Ladin dresses and acts like a frigid, mean-spirited lesbian!'

He retaliated by yelling, 'Oh yeah? Well, so does Julia Gillard !'

'And, there we were, in the middle of the road, laughing, shaking hands, when a truck hit us.'

gr8-expectations · « **Reply #1206 on:** December 07, 2009, 11:35:50 AM »

LOL YIBBY

tommy.irene · « **Reply #1207 on:** December 25, 2009, 04:28:33 AM »

Merry Christmas Everyone..

tommy.irene · « **Reply #1208 on:** January 03, 2010, 09:30:43 PM »

Girlie Wisdom!

Women over 50 don't have babies because they would put them down and forget where they left them.

A friend of mine confused her Valium with her birth control pills... she has 14 kids but doesn't really care.

One of life's mysteries is how a 2-pound box of chocolates can make a woman gain 5 lbs.

My mind not only wanders, it sometimes leaves completely.

The best way to forget your troubles is to wear tight shoes.

The nice part about living in a small town is that when you don't know what you are doing, someone else does.

The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight because by then, your body and your fat are really good friends.

Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.

Sometimes I think I understand everything, and then I regain consciousness.

I gave up jogging for my health when my thighs kept rubbing together and setting fire to my knicker's.

Amazing! You hang something in your closet for a while and it shrinks 2 sizes!

Skinny people irritate me! Especially when they say things like...'You know sometimes I forget to eat!' ......Now I've forgotten my address, my mother's maiden name and my keys, but I have never forgotten to eat. You have to be a special kind of stupid to forget to eat!

The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing and then they marry him.

I read this article that said the typical symptoms of stress are eating too much, impulse buying, and driving too fast. Are they kidding? That's my idea of a perfect day!

LIVE SIMPLY.....LAUGH OFTEN....LOVE DEEPLY

tommy.irene · « **Reply #1209 on:** January 10, 2010, 04:23:26 AM »

Goodmorning everyone..

*smee* · « **Reply #1210 on:** January 10, 2010, 07:44:48 AM »

good night Tommy ... Smee Enterprises is shutting up shop for a couple of hours shut eye

tommy.irene · « **Reply #1211 on:** January 13, 2010, 06:15:30 PM »

Goodmorning

tellomon · « **Reply #1212 on:** January 13, 2010, 07:52:56 PM »

HI! Could somebody get this demon off my shoulder, pls?

SEND HELP....

*smee* · « **Reply #1213 on:** January 13, 2010, 08:55:03 PM »

I can help get rid of him

tommy.irene · « **Reply #1214 on:** January 19, 2010, 06:10:08 AM »

Do you eat ducks too

*CountessA* · « **Reply #1215 on:** January 19, 2010, 07:47:33 AM »

I have no doubt that Smee has had his share of Peking Duck.

tommy.irene · « **Reply #1216 on:** January 24, 2010, 08:13:30 PM »

and aussey duck to..

Al**Bear · « **Reply #1217 on:** January 24, 2010, 08:37:01 PM »

Hi Tommy

yvonnea6313 · « **Reply #1218 on:** January 24, 2010, 08:40:04 PM »

Morning Tommy

Morning Al

*CountessA* · « **Reply #1219 on:** January 24, 2010, 09:12:08 PM »

And hello, Tommy - you've stripped off again! The weather must be terrific on the island, hmm?

Hello, Al**Bear - It's been too long since you posted here. I see you've spotted the "indubitably" emoticon, which is certainly one of my favourites.

(And hello again, Yvonne!)

*FluffyDuckee* · « **Reply #1220 on:** January 24, 2010, 11:53:58 PM »

Hi Al.... Great to see ya

Quote from: tommy.irene on January 24, 2010, 08:13:30 PM

and aussey duck to..

Al**Bear · « **Reply #1221 on:** January 25, 2010, 05:29:53 PM »

Good Morning or Arvo Peeps

cueperkins · « **Reply #1222 on:** January 25, 2010, 05:39:51 PM »

Afternoon Al....long time no see....welcome back...hi fluffy

Al**Bear · « **Reply #1223 on:** January 25, 2010, 05:49:18 PM »

Hi Cupie

7.50 am here

cueperkins · « **Reply #1224 on:** January 25, 2010, 05:52:24 PM »

Has it been as cold in the UK as we've been hearing?....we're imagining a whole lot of brass monkeys running around looking for welders...lol

Al**Bear · « **Reply #1225 on:** January 25, 2010, 06:03:52 PM »

In my area we were below freezing from Dec 18 till last Monday, we had temps as low as -14 C but mostly about -3 C

*CountessA* · « **Reply #1226 on:** January 25, 2010, 06:06:28 PM »

5.55 Monday evening here - and it's actually a lovely day at the moment. The sky is baby blue, the light is clear and rapturous...

Cupie · « **Reply #1227 on:** January 25, 2010, 06:08:08 PM »

Brrrhhhhhh!!!.....We've been having absolute heat waves over here... 45 degree days for some regions, and even on the coast, it's been pushing 41 degrees and over .

So where are those other two...embsie and logsie?......I see logsie popped in last night too?....

Al**Bear · « **Reply #1228 on:** January 25, 2010, 06:14:03 PM »

I'm talking to Countessa and Embsie on the UK RT right now

*smee* · « **Reply #1229 on:** January 25, 2010, 06:19:39 PM »

G'day Al ... great to hear from you , hope all is well

Cupie · « **Reply #1230 on:** January 25, 2010, 06:24:12 PM »

Can you post the link here Al?...so it's easier to find ya's?....

*CountessA* · « **Reply #1231 on:** January 25, 2010, 06:27:07 PM »

http://forums.ebay.co.uk/thread.jspa?threadID=1100254966&tstart=0&mod=1264398194026
http://forums.ebay.co.uk/thread.jspa?threadID=1200334552&tstart=0&mod=1264398497558

... Those two will do.

Al**Bear · « **Reply #1232 on:** January 25, 2010, 06:55:20 PM »

Hi Smee mate

Hows it hanging ?

Cupie · « **Reply #1233 on:** January 25, 2010, 07:50:14 PM »

Vonnie's tellin fibs...lol....she said that we never recovered from embsie and logsie's last visit...it isn't true.....we're made of much tougher stuff than that....

Embsie reckons we pelted him with emu eggs....not likely, their endangered, and you wouldn't want mama emu to catch ya steeling her eggs,.....crikey she might kick your dunny down.....

*smee* · « **Reply #1234 on:** January 25, 2010, 08:16:19 PM »

Quote from: Al**Bear on January 25, 2010, 06:55:20 PM

Hi Smee mate

Hows it hanging ?

like a Vincent Van Gogh!

*smee* · « **Reply #1235 on:** January 28, 2010, 06:12:48 PM »

Quote from: *Countessa* on January 19, 2010, 07:47:33 AM

I have no doubt that Smee has had his share of Peking Duck.

cooked Peking Duck for lunch today had it wrapped in thin chinese pancake spread with hoisin sauce and added spring onion and cucumber ....... lovely !!!!!

tommy.irene · « **Reply #1236 on:** January 28, 2010, 08:33:10 PM »

Has all the UKers gone home ????

Cupie · « **Reply #1237 on:** January 28, 2010, 08:50:52 PM »

They seem to drop in from time to time Tommy, but I guess home is the UK RT...of course...just like this is our home...

*Ubbie Max* · « **Reply #1238 on:** January 28, 2010, 09:04:53 PM »

Hey Smee, what's with the spring onion and cucumber caper thing? Shocking way to ruin a good feed.

tommy.irene · « **Reply #1239 on:** January 28, 2010, 09:39:07 PM »

Just like me Cupie..only call in to house to look for mail

tommy.irene · « **Reply #1240 on:** February 02, 2010, 10:28:31 PM »

No mail today..

*smee* · « **Reply #1241 on:** February 02, 2010, 10:29:54 PM »

expect heaps on valentines day Tommy !

tommy.irene · « **Reply #1242 on:** February 03, 2010, 08:38:02 AM »

I expect one from Irene on valentines day

*smee* · « **Reply #1243 on:** February 03, 2010, 07:46:44 PM »

Quote from: tommy.irene on February 03, 2010, 08:38:02 AM

I expect one from Irene on valentines day

and a card too ?

tellomon · « **Reply #1244 on:** February 04, 2010, 04:26:39 PM »

I suspect choccy in the bag.

tommy.irene · « **Reply #1245 on:** February 05, 2010, 10:22:33 PM »

Hope i get choc

:mobbing:late

*CountessA* · « **Reply #1246 on:** February 06, 2010, 09:16:56 AM »

Loving chocolate is a beautiful gift. Cheap chocolate is an insult from an enemy.

(Excerpt from "Wise Sayings of the Inscrutable Chocolate Lover")

*Ubbie Max* · « **Reply #1247 on:** February 06, 2010, 06:10:26 PM »

I'm not sure where to post this piece of information but, we Australians & our British friends deserve to know;

Do you remember February 1993 in England , when a young boy of 3 was taken from a Liverpool shopping centre by two 10-year-old boys?
Jamie Bulger walked away from his mother for only a second, Jon Venables took his hand and led him out of the mall with his friend Robert Thompson. They took
Jamie on a walk for over 2 and a half miles, along the way stopping every now and again to torture the poor little boy who was crying constantly for his mummy.

Finally they stopped at a railway track where they brutally kicked him, threw stones at him, rubbed paint in his eyes, pushed batteries up his anus and cut his fingers off with scissors. Other mutilations were inflicted but not reported in the press.

N.B. :- Remember, a 3year old cannot possibly defend themselves against a 10 year old, let alone of 2 them.

What these two boys did was so horrendous that Jamie's mother was forbidden to identify his body.

They then left his beaten small body on railway tracks so a train could run him over to hide the mess they had created. These two boys, even being boys, understood what they did was wrong, hence trying to make it look like an accident.

This week Lady Justice Butler-Sloss has awarded the two boys ( now men ), anonymity for the rest of

their lives when they leave custody with new identities. They will also leave custody early only serving just over half of their sentence.

They are being relocated to Australia to live out the rest of their lives. They disgustingly and violently took Jamie's life away and in return they each get a new life!

Why must we accept such vile creatures from another country?

*CountessA* · « **Reply #1248 on:** February 06, 2010, 06:40:42 PM »

Sickening.

Sickening in every respect.

tellomon · « **Reply #1249 on:** February 06, 2010, 06:49:08 PM »

Meanwhile, Justice is nowhere to be found......

News:

Author Topic: ++++ WHATS UP WITH THE UK BOARD ++++ (Read 570797 times)

gr8-expectations

yvonnea6313

cueperkins

cueperkins

**Cupie**

**Cupie**

**Cupie**

**Cupie**

Cupie

Cupie

Cupie

Cupie