Author Topic: The Tello Files. (All things strange, witnessed, verifyable and/or credible (?) (Read 3152976 times)

tellomon · « **Reply #9400 on:** January 29, 2021, 08:33:48 PM »

How can I be dealing in "Shady Shite"
when I live in the winter shade of the homestead grade?

That's not a fair assessment and I ain't playin' that shite.

Foo.

tellomon · « **Reply #9401 on:** January 29, 2021, 08:41:38 PM »

When I hear TV saying "BAIL OUT"
I want to believe it's all about snow plows.

No. That's not a reality.

Real is what I got to eat vs TP supply
and toilet bags in stock.

REAL THIS Sweeties!!!!

It's NOT Camping.
It's a Desert Rat on a Mountain Top, and I ain't afraid of nuthin' except your sister.
She dissed me man. Said my TV habits were perverse.
Yeah, Law and Order: SVU can be controversial, ya Mental Midget piece of Jerky shite!!!!

What? Ya think yer the second coming of Princess Di?

Pix or it dint happen.

tellomon · « **Reply #9402 on:** January 29, 2021, 08:53:18 PM »

I don't need pix to happen.

I use tools.

I am quietly waiting for the Spring Day when I break out my new inthebox Drill Press.

I plan to use it in the most creative MAD ways to murder the enemies of the Sacred Trash Can.

Moron that later.....

tellomon · « **Reply #9403 on:** January 29, 2021, 09:05:04 PM »

Shop Talk is the language that:

>Real Men aspire to

>Women fear, reject and wrongly criticize

>Boys wanna speak

Fathers, teach your children Gun Safety well!
And then later explain the proper operation of a Bench Grinder and a Chain Saw.
And if they fail, Arts and Crafts are an alternative....

We don't advocate injuries here,
and we don't like WIMPS!!!!

tellomon · « **Reply #9404 on:** January 29, 2021, 09:16:41 PM »

Tool Up or get lost, pussy!

tellomon · « **Reply #9405 on:** January 29, 2021, 09:19:05 PM »

Somehow...glitter and glue is NOT an Industrial Asset.

tellomon · « **Reply #9406 on:** January 29, 2021, 09:21:50 PM »

And Pink Ponies make excellent Burgers!

Kiss your daughters Good Night and Good Bye.

tellomon · « **Reply #9407 on:** January 29, 2021, 09:31:11 PM »

No more dreaming until the Masses WAKE UP!

Like, it's not gonna happen...

Dream on ya morons!!!

The world is not Ending: you are.

Whoo-ya!

tellomon · « **Reply #9408 on:** January 29, 2021, 09:35:46 PM »

Are you really gonna rely on the Wizard on The Mountain
to be your chore guide?

Ain't happened since Moses, and he couldda been Jiving.

tellomon · « **Reply #9409 on:** January 29, 2021, 09:41:33 PM »

I know nothing.
I know everything.
Somewhere in between maybe, huh?

It has made me stupid crazy without an alibi.

This is my Head and welcome to it.

It ain't much but it's all I got.
(Cover Story)

tellomon · « **Reply #9410 on:** January 29, 2021, 09:44:43 PM »

shut up smee

I'm microwaving my Miranda Rights.

tellomon · « **Reply #9411 on:** January 29, 2021, 09:49:06 PM »

Whatever it is.. I confess.

Love to see the evidence!

Ooooh....that's gotta hurt.

Case dismissed with leave to represent.

tellomon · « **Reply #9412 on:** January 29, 2021, 09:50:21 PM »

And if anybody should ask,
tellem she wanted it.

And her mom said it was ok.

tellomon · « **Reply #9413 on:** January 29, 2021, 09:59:11 PM »

When cooking in a conventional microwave oven
be sure to adjust your cooking time to the elevation.

If the package says 4 minutes, do 8, then stop and let it cool.

The Higher Elevation, people! This is where the line is drawn between Flatlanders, Brits, Frogs, Fakirs, Aussies, dicks cunts and naggers and others .....from the Oxygen-deficient Mountain Men and Wimmen at 7500 Feet elevation and climbing.

Taking a "Puff" is not about smoking.
It's about breathing.

And toileting can be adventurous too.

No details available.

tellomon · « **Reply #9414 on:** January 29, 2021, 10:28:50 PM »

Frankly, I cannot poo if I am not breathing much, at all...

I work with gravity to serve my needs.

*Closed*

tellomon · « **Reply #9415 on:** January 29, 2021, 10:46:36 PM »

John Bays
Visual Storyteller
· January 25 at 2:39 PM ·
You know you're from the mountains when - This is the view outside your window.

tellomon · « **Reply #9416 on:** January 29, 2021, 10:50:49 PM »

The views out my windows are null.
Snow, ice and spiders obstruct my view of more snow ice and spiders....

tellomon · « **Reply #9417 on:** January 29, 2021, 11:02:53 PM »

Ron DeWindt
June 13, 2020 ·
“Drink water from the spring where horses drink.
The horse will never drink bad water.
Lay your bed where the cat sleeps.
Eat the fruit that has been touched by a worm.
Boldly pick the mushroom on which the insects sit.
Plant the tree where the mole digs.
Build your house where the snake sits to warm itself.
Dig your fountain where the birds hide from heat.
Go to sleep and wake up at the same time with the birds – you will reap all of the days golden grains.
Eat more green – you will have strong legs and a resistant heart, like the beings of the forest.
Swim often and you will feel on earth like the fish in the water.
Look at the sky as often as possible and your thoughts will become light and clear.

Be quiet a lot, speak little – and silence will come in your heart, and your spirit will be calm and full of peace.

And if the Band you're in starts playing a different tune,
I'll see you on the Dark Side of The Moon.”

Saint Floyd Seraphim of Pink Sarov

tellomon · « **Reply #9418 on:** January 29, 2021, 11:30:23 PM »

Ron Tello Culley
Better than a Collage Prank: No School work!

Ron Tello Culley
I have evidence!
Before the Prank: 🙁
After the Prank: 🙂
Discuss.

Ron Tello Culley
There's no getting out of this one.

Sherise Libertone
Seriously well thought out! Perfectly executed! Can’t stop laughing. Thank you 😂

Trevor Duran
I won this thread lol

Ron Tello Culley
I can NEVER follow an act like this!

Ron Tello Culley
And in other news, it's snowing, as advertised.
Suck it up, Sweeties, the children will love you for it.

tellomon · « **Reply #9419 on:** January 29, 2021, 11:58:52 PM »

Why am I not viral?
Or on Tv?
Or 6 feet under?

You love me/hate me
but you won't pay me my due and proper.

Proof positive the fake world
is a real park bench.

And that's Jailtalk for "it ain't good".

Now, to take this eclectic roller coaster to the next level of Mother's Worry and every little girls best nightmare....The T Files now introduces..

INTERMISSION

BRB, or not...

tellomon · « **Reply #9420 on:** January 30, 2021, 12:02:25 AM »

Hey, smee!

Off called and asked if you have those felafels he ordered!

tellomon · « **Reply #9421 on:** January 30, 2021, 12:12:07 AM »

No continuity.

I should perhaps ascribe a modicum of pride to my INC.,
even tho it's a bust.

If it wazzint for a sad felafel
I'd have no felafel at all....

Other than reality, we here at TTF HQ are having AM Snow Cones ala carte.
At this exact moment, weather TV is going Apeshit and we don't buy that play.
We play the field, and win!
Snow what?
Snuck you!

tellomon · « **Reply #9422 on:** January 30, 2021, 12:23:58 AM »

Am I drinking too much or am I going blind?

Look at me when I'm yelling at the deaf man.

I need back up to express wishes, desires and the need to pee in a timely manner
within the safe erudite confines of a Home Delivered Nightmare Rooming House for the Old Hippies
and other Dissidents throughout History.

It's a rumor.
I'm supposed to die in 1990.

felafeled up Cozmos, pisses me off...and that's where I let it fly!.

So ennyway.....

tellomon · « **Reply #9423 on:** January 30, 2021, 12:29:21 AM »

please stop me

*snipe 190* it's getting really bad, Mm-Kay?

tellomon · « **Reply #9424 on:** January 30, 2021, 12:33:04 AM »

Manicured Trigger Fingers.

Get that going on in The South.

tellomon · « **Reply #9425 on:** January 30, 2021, 12:40:04 AM »

In every shining bright cloud of your delightful air-head life
there is a train wreck to felafel up your Amazon deliveries.
Or was it eBay?
Whatever, FELAFEL U yazzum!

tellomon · « **Reply #9426 on:** January 30, 2021, 12:47:08 AM »

Get a Grip people!
If ya can't get it...MAKE IT!

What, say candles?
Boil your jewelry and soaps.

You might have to slaughter your dog for the fat content.

Better you should stockpile that Dollar Store shite NOW
and feed your dog while it still has a chance to run away.

tellomon · « **Reply #9427 on:** January 30, 2021, 01:03:47 AM »

Dee Levey
Admin
· 1h ·
😢😡Spent the last 24 hours doing everything I can to advise my vacation rental owner to contact my Friday check-outs/checkins to advise regarding the storm. So far nothing,no response.
Chances are those scheduled to leave today may be stuck,road conditions are bad. I'm willing to bet there is zero chance they are getting out of town today and they will be stranded😢and those thinking they can get up here may have nowhere to stay. 😢
Not to mention my safety,I may not even be able to get to the rentals to try to clean them😢
Some local businesses and restaurants are closing today for tbe safety of their employees. God bless them for caring.
Putting peoples lives in danger makes no sense😡Please DO NOT TRY TO TRAVEL TO THE MOUNTAIN COMMUNITIES,PLEASE WAIT TIL THE STORM PASSES AND THE ROADS ARE SAFE🙏

Ron Tello Culley
LOL, nothing brings people together more than STRANDED.

I wanna make new friends, but not if they are idiots. That's what High School was for. I'm looking for something more Evolved.

tellomon · « **Reply #9428 on:** January 30, 2021, 01:06:34 AM »

Dee Levey
Admin
· 55m ·
R3 Conditions on the 18,Lucerne to Bear/Bear to Lucerne,also Bear to Running Springs/Running Springs to Bear...R2 on the 330,R2 on 38,38 NOT recommended for travel...TRUST ME IT'S ONLY GOING TO GET WORSE. DO NOT TRY TO TRAVEL TO THE MOUNTAINS TODAY!

Debbie Hibbetts
Thank you for sharing.

Rebecca Jo Gaines
Stay home

Ron Tello Culley
Well now that you put it that way, Sure! Shelter in Place and look out for renegade sleds.

tellomon · « **Reply #9429 on:** January 30, 2021, 01:18:16 AM »

Misty Younger-Keenan
Lives in Crestline, California
Jan 21, 2021, 1:28 PM

Misty sent January 21 at 1:28 PM
Your posts about minimum wage doesn't belong in the mtn page. That's why it was deleted. Your current post about it being deleted needs to go as well. Please delete or I will. Thank you

Part of my punishment for being an American Joker with an Agenda.
So be it!

Not FELAFEL U.

tellomon · « **Reply #9430 on:** January 30, 2021, 01:31:58 AM »

I question the logic, if any, behind that Admin decision.

Like, so the Mountains don't have a job
so minimum wage is of no concern to them.

Right.

And the inhabitants of the mountains are
chopped snowman liver.

I get it now.

Admin.

felafel me.

Ok, next time and it won't an ordinary time. I'm making this special!

I'm breaking out the TEAL on their ass!

tellomon · « **Reply #9431 on:** January 30, 2021, 01:43:48 AM »

Jason Hanson <thespy@spybriefing.com>

To:
m86thecat@yahoo.com

Fri, Jan 29 at 5:34 AM

I’m sure you’re familiar with facial recognition software…
But did you know there’s gun recognition software too?
It (tries) to work the same way as facial recognition.
For instance…

Let’s say someone is walking around the grocery store and they reach for an item high up on a shelf.
Their shirt lifts a bit and a camera in the grocery store thinks it sees the grip of a gun.
An alert is sent to a security guard in a control center who looks at the video and then sounds an alarm and calls police.

The thing is…
This software is far from accurate.
It was used in a school in New York and guess what happened?
The alerts went off often and there were no guns.

Instead, broom handles triggered the alarms as the software thought a broom was a gun.
It won’t surprise you that I’m not a fan of this software and the invasion of privacy.

But I’m sure the Biden administration will try and put it as many places as possible to appease their voters.
Just remember, some part of the gun must be seen in order for the software to detect it.
Personally, 99% of the time I concealed carry and I don’t open carry my gun.

I carry my gun in my pocket or on my hip and nobody can see it. (this free DVD shows you what to do)
I always want the element of surprise if I ever have to use my gun.

We live in a world where one day we won’t be able to walk down the street without a gazillion alarms going off, which is why I have no desire to ever live in a big city again.
Stay safe,

Jason Hanson
Former CIA Officer
Editor, Spy & Survival Briefing

"What a nice man!"

tellomon · « **Reply #9432 on:** January 30, 2021, 01:57:04 AM »

Weather Channel
A Noob Geek on the show.

He did a blip on my area
the Cajon Pass

Pronounced ka-HONE.

Bonehead pronounced it KA-jun.

It's ok.
When I was in Florida, the Rock Radio DJ announced the Debut Van Halen album as Van Hallen.
I straitened him out. I know the Band personally.

So ok, keep talking but get it right!

tellomon · « **Reply #9433 on:** January 30, 2021, 02:05:34 AM »

Mammoth got 8 feet of powder.
I got 1.
Not bad for not trying.

tellomon · « **Reply #9434 on:** January 30, 2021, 02:11:23 AM »

I live here?
Can ya see me? I'm waving at you at the Gate of the Trailer Park on The Mountain!

tellomon · « **Reply #9435 on:** January 30, 2021, 02:37:07 AM »

Cheri Lynn
No one should be traveling today!! I almost wish they’d close the roads until they are well plowed.

Ron Tello Culley
DIY Road Blocks. I did it, they work, I wasn't around to hear
any complaints. Just a Road-you can't come in-Block.
Orange cones, yellow tape, you know what to do....

tellomon · « **Reply #9436 on:** January 30, 2021, 02:45:19 AM »

Ron Tello Culley
LOL, nothing brings people together more than STRANDED.

Ron Tello Culley
Seriously. Watch "Night of The Living Dead"
and see how a crisis
brings people together!

tellomon · « **Reply #9437 on:** January 30, 2021, 02:58:21 AM »

I got a spitball with Harry Cooper's name on it.

I don't care who you are.
If your name is Harry Cooper
you are NOT getting in!

Drag yourself out and feed yourself to those things.

Checkout Mammoth. Think you have problems?
Think again, LOL!

tellomon · « **Reply #9438 on:** January 30, 2021, 03:31:29 AM »

Hey, it's not enuff that I'm getting away with all kinds of shite here...
facebook has not hassled me yet.

A mild disappointment.

tellomon · « **Reply #9439 on:** January 30, 2021, 03:33:45 AM »

Everybody is a potential Porn Star.

Look around
everybody is F*cked!

tellomon · « **Reply #9440 on:** January 30, 2021, 03:37:54 AM »

And I do feel and BE guilty of living/surviving better than most, especially the folks on TV after a booger blew away their Farm, or crushed their lids.

This is not just weather;
This is The Hand of an angry god
spanking you felafelers
and but good!

tellomon · « **Reply #9441 on:** January 30, 2021, 03:42:53 AM »

See: I'm being punished for my intimate indiscretions
in Nevada, Florida and all parts in between.
(Specifically, I dint get the good stuff on Video, and what I got is lame.)

You are getting it cuz yer morons
or worse,
and it's
"Cause and Effect" Baby!!!

Deal widdit.

Guys, it's 8:50 AM on the Best Coast.
Do you know where your dick is?

tellomon · « **Reply #9442 on:** January 30, 2021, 03:59:49 AM »

Remember I posted earlier about
mine fell off.

It's good news actually.
I no longer have the compunction to be a
chickey-doodle molester
therefore my odds of going to jail are decreased 1000 fold.

It doesn't control me anymore.
I'm not a eunuch.
I'm a dick without a car.

tellomon · « **Reply #9443 on:** January 30, 2021, 04:05:18 AM »

And right now, in this current slam snow fall event
a car ain't shite.

tellomon · « **Reply #9444 on:** January 30, 2021, 04:07:27 AM »

So FELAFEL U

tellomon · « **Reply #9445 on:** January 30, 2021, 04:20:51 AM »

1079564 Views

tellomon · « **Reply #9446 on:** January 30, 2021, 04:23:40 AM »

More snow than
you can shake
a
plow at!

tellomon · « **Reply #9447 on:** January 30, 2021, 04:28:41 AM »

And the icicles: Weaponized weather.

Worse than a murderer.

They are weapons of weather.

And they WILL felafel you up!

tellomon · « **Reply #9448 on:** January 30, 2021, 04:35:55 AM »

I have been a Hero
long ago
or so it seems
but I was there
did it
and it was good.

Call me Mister Unsung.

And now you,,,,go do good things on yer own

or I'm gonna tell DickRat what to do...

He's on Noon Break right now....

tellomon · « **Reply #9449 on:** January 30, 2021, 04:56:31 AM »

Excuse me!
Have there been any lessons to be had hereabouts?

I have a purpose in life, or so I was tricked to believe.
I cannot explain or excuse the nature and contextual undertones of this eJoint.
but I will confess, this OZ racket is my #1 Sanity Maker and breaker, and I Praise
Ingrid the Absent Hall Monitor, CEO and Founder of the OZRTello.

Jeez, if this was not on, I'd be condemned to a life of Talk Radio and stale TV.
Just cuz stuff is electronic duzzint make it good.

Oh no! I'm wandering into Standards.
Can't have them.
Ruin my image.

Thank You!

News:

Author Topic: The Tello Files. (All things strange, witnessed, verifyable and/or credible (?) (Read 3152976 times)